The OK Auto Response

The OK Shepherd believes out-of-office email auto responses present a unique opportunity to mock out-of-office email auto responses. The OK Shepherd suggests that you commit at least one hour to compose an appropriately foolish and still delightful out-of-office email auto response.

Once you accept the fact that nobody cares if you are in, out, on top, under, beside, around, or ate the office, the meaningless words about your current circumstances will naturally come to you.

Enjoy the opportunity to fall short of professional standards because professionalism in email auto responses is boring. The OK Shepherd watches sheep eat grass all day, very professional and also boring.. Writing a custom auto email response will make one day feel like two.

For help getting started, note the out-of-office email response below that I wrote for my assistant a few days ago. She went to an island in the ocean.


Hello,
This is an automated response from my computer to yours.
For the next three weeks I am abstaining from work. During that time, I plan to remain horizontal as much as possible.
I will only stand to walk from one piece of horizontal support equipment to another (e.g. bed to reclining pool-side lounge chair, reclining pool-side lounge chair to reclining beach lounge chair, reclining beach lounge chair to bed).
When I come back to work on July 11th, I will sit in a chair that does not recline and read your email.
Until then, if you need immediate assistance, first lie down and think about how urgent the matter is. From the reclined position, it is possible the you will slip into sleep and wake with no memory of the "urgent" matter. This happens to me all that time.
Another option, if going to sleep is not possible, would be to contact DOWNTOWN CHURCH at 803-875-0156. We try to keep at least one person on staff awake during the day for moments like this.